Oh! The spider stories I could tell. Most of them are not mine. Why? Because I do not play with spiders! I do not toy with death! Spiders are tasteless slobs! I will not hang out with them, nor will I join any club in which spiders are members or even members-at-large.
Nope.
Not me.
Because I am not stuppid.
Well, OK, I will tolerate the spiders that make pretty webs in the autumn. But those are the only ones! The rest of 'em shouldn't be allowed to live in nice neighborhoods. Put that in your HOA rule book and smoke it.
[Also, the biggest screams I ever heard in my entire life were when Amy -- yes, our Amy of this blog -- was about 13 years old. A spider found Amy at the breakfast table and was taking a stroll up Amy's arm to say hello more closely. Amy did not appreciate this overture. Amy can really, really scream.]
I'm with you on the spiders - and although I'm not scared of them, mosquitos and fleas can take a hike too !
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